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  Alexandria Nicole Haddock

August 6th, 1993 - February 16th, 2003


Alexandria Nicole Haddock earned her beautiful pink-tipped angel wings at 10:20 p.m., Sunday, February 16th, 2003. She left this earth feeling no pain and flew into the arms of our Lord and Savior. At the moment she took her last breath, she was holding the three things she wanted to be holding when she left this earth, her mommy's hand, her daddy's hand, and moonbeam..."the magical unicorn that could work miracles."

Alexandria was a very happy and healthy child until the age of seven. After suffering from headaches, nausea, vomiting and bruising for several weeks her pediatrician finally ordered blood work on November 7th, 2000. It was election day and while everyone in the country waited on baited breath to see who would be our next president, a lab technician was counting 1 million white blood cells in my daughter's CBC. An average WBC count is 5-15,000. We rushed her to St. Louis Children's Hospital. Our pediatrician said the word "leukemia" and at the time, in my state of complete shock, I did not even realize how bad things really were. She was admitted to the PICU where they hooked her up to a pheresis machine. This basically took her blood out slowly, spun off the white blood cells, and was put back in to her. She was in grave condition and they were not sure if she would make it through the night. She did. She got into remission within 30 days and continued with extremely intense chemotherapy for 20 months. The chemo made her immune system non-existant for almost that entire time. She fought several infections in that time period and we were not sure if she would make it or not. She did. On April 11th, 2002, we were moving into a new home. We received a call from her hemonc doctor telling us that a spinal fluid test that had been submitted to St. Jude's per our request, had come back higher than a previous one. Grant and I wrestled with the decision to keep her treatments at Children's Hospital. We were told that we would probably be able to get her back into remission quickly if this was the case and then we could proceed to Bone Marrow Transplant. Uneasy about this major decision, we once again, just like when she was initially diagnosed, contacted prestigous doctors from around the country. Several felt that we should get her to transplant quickly while she was still strong. We should have followed their advice. We had a strong suspicion that relapse was imminent. We were right. Sadly and unfortunately, Alexandria did relapse on July 11th, 2002. It was difficult to get her back into remission. She again suffered from horrible infections that bought her a ticket to the hospital and almost cost her her life. She made it through. She proceeded into transplant with her brother, Hunter, as her donor on October 1st 2002. Her brother Hayden and sister Addison were matches too, which was amazing. She sailed through the chemo, the radiation and extended isolation hospital stay. We felt like we had won. We felt this was our second chance at a healthy life for our precious daughter who had fought so incredibly hard for so long. This was not to be, not God's plan or purpose for her life. Her mission on this earth was completed on February 16th, 2003. She passed so peacefully. It is almost two years ago that she left our arms to go to Jesus'. Not a single day goes by that I don't think about her, long to hear her voice, hold her hand or see that beautiful face. There is a hole in my heart that can never be filled. However, from this trial I have learned a great deal, mostly from my daughter who was always positive and cheery even when she felt horrible. I gained greater knowledge of my Lord and Savior and my faith has grown in spite of this loss.